MB2KXI – The year of potentially lost scorecards.

Some may call him brash, with his Strong Island accent. Others may call him flamboyant, with his colorful golf outfits.  Others may call him a Jew, just because.  You can all call him Champion.  Matt ‘Tino’ Martinez came back from 4 strokes down entering the final round to claim his first MB2K championship in his rookie year on the tour.  Matt put together 4 consistent rounds of golf in the wettest MB2K to date, shooting his best score of 88 in the final round Tuesday to capture the tournament by 5 strokes over Jon Riba. He becomes the 2^nd player in MB2K history to win in his first year, following MB2K6 winner Chris Grove. With his win, the current MB2K standings are as follows:

3 wins – Greg Picarello

2 wins – Neil Schoenberg, Robert Smith the III

1 win – Chris Grove, Mike Riba, Peter Vinch, Matt Martinez

BPTHNWAM – Jon Riba

Final scores will be posted on MB2K.com, However, for our records, with handicap adjustments, they ended as:

Seventh place – Mike Riba - 376

Sixth place - Neil Schoenberg - 359

Tied Third place – Peter Vinch - 353

Tied Third place – Greg Picarello - 353

Tied Third place – Robert Smith III - 353

Second place – Jon Riba - 350

First place – Matt Martinez – 345

Now onto the ramblings:

Starting this year, the Top 10 Quotes/Sayings/Objects of MB2K has been expanded to include Food since we are all fat-asses.

The Top 10 Quotes/Sayings/Objects/Foods of MB2KXI:

HM. Firehouse Subs Meatball Sub – A long standing MB2K tradition was skipped in MB2KX, but brought back as the first meal this year after our Friday travels for Bob, Neil, Pic and Mike. 

10. The game room – One of the many perks of the Tahitian Princess, our game room featured a foozball table, pool table, semi-working air hockey table and a Sopranos pinball machine.  Sadly the game room was utilized primarily in night 1, and not much else. 

9. The ripped up $20 – Just one of many “apparently” moments of the Sunday Night Sportsbar/Stripclub.

8.  Rufus – Mike Riba’s real name.

7. Crazy Horse aka Crazy Whores – You learn something new every day.  ‘Let’s go down to the stripclub and see some crazy whores’.

6. Monday Night Papa John’s feast – 4 large pizzas and 4 cheesy breads. It wasn’t MB2K9 Sticky Fingaz but it was close.  Go big papa!

5. F- - The closest thing to a saying this year was Pete’s inspiring effort to place F- into our vocabulary.  I did find myself saying it every so often, as there are immense fails each year in MB2K.  Our sayings at Myrtle this year deserved, you guessed it, an F-.

4. $35 golf shoes – Mike wins best purchase of MB2K11!

3. $3 cab ride – The polar opposite of last year’s cab ride home with the bridge incident - The 233% tip trumps our tip from Overtimes last year for Kathie Lee of approximately 50%.

2.  Chik-Fil-A – The official sponsor of MB2K11 – It began with Matt being unaware of the wonderfulness that is Chik-Fil-A. It followed with a tense breakfast for Pete as Rufus felt slighted for not being asked if he wanted anything, but not slighted enough to call Pete and ask him to bring him back something.  And if finished with lunch on Tuesday for the late four-some as bets were made over sauce drinking.  Unfortunately, Bob’s favorite kind of sauce isn’t offered at Chik-Fil-A, but it might be offered at Dude-Fil-bobA. 

1. The Beach! It took 11 years, but we finally made it to the beach. Bob, Pic, Mike and Pete finally took their romantic stroll on the beach during the Sportsbar/Stripclub intermission.  Apparently Bob made a beachfoam hat.

The Top 10 Most Disappointing Moments, Events, Things of MB2KX:

HM. The lost scorecards – This is still not a definite, but it’s a possibility that the scorecards from the first two days of MB2K11 were misplaced. NO STATS?? NO!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

10. Our Outback waiter – Hey ya’ll. Listen ya’ll. Our Outback waiter has 3 kids, and he needs our additional tip on top of 18% that’s on the bill to pay for those kids.  C’mon ya’ll.  His name was probably Gabe (Gay-B).

9.  The annoying Eagles fan at Overtimes – Every time the Eagles did something against the Bills, that dude stared right at Neil and started clapping.  He wasn’t Maclin, but he was close.  Pete, Eagles fandom be damned, was recruited to stomp him if it got out of hand. 

8. MB2K11 Club Tosses – Runner up goes to Neil for his club toss at Prestwick where he chunked his iron shot about 40 yards and proceeded to throw his club approximately the same distance to within 3 feet of his ball.  First place goes to Bob for his Caledonia toss which landed firmly on the cart path, but did not damage his club. Maximum effort for minimum cost - well played sir.

7.  No extra golf – MB2K11 did not feature a practice round or a scramble.  MB2K12 will hopefully feature one of these events with the Matt Martinez family free round at Pine Lakes, The Granddaddy of Myrtle Beach golf. 

6.  The Rivers Edge false start – The starter told us to go to #1 and begin our round. Not only did it start raining, but after Matt and John teed off, the starter returned and told us we had to go back to the clubhouse because maintenance was still working on the hole.  20 minutes later we were allowed to go back to #1, but we had to let a single go off in front of us.  Sloppy job Rivers Edge! More from your course later…

5.  Neil’s flight from Atlanta to Baton Rouge – While all of you (sans driving Matt) were enjoying your flights from Charlotte to your final destination, Neil was stuck for a night in Atlanta as a junction box in Baton Rouge caught fire and damaged the runway lights for the night.  And since Delta sucks balls, he couldn’t even get back his checked bags.  The Tahitian Princess would have been a much better option for the evening. Pete Vinch says, F- for Delta, and F- for junction boxes!!!

4. The sprinklers at the Barefoot Norman course – The threesome of Bob, Neil and Pete played the Norman course so quickly Sunday morning that the timed sprinklers on the holes were still going off while we played them.  The ground wasn’t dry, and the sprinklers soaked a few areas. Plus it rained the next two days.  Sprinklers, Pete Vinch gives you an F-!!

3. MB2K11 Cartgirls – Pete, is there something worse than an F-, because this was just awful this year.  We’ve been trending poorly with cartgirls the last few years, but this year we went 0-3 and Rivers Edge saved us the trouble by not even having one in the pouring rain Tuesday.  This year was so bad that the girls in the restaurants weren’t even attractive.  WTF Myrtle.  Double-u Tee Eff.

2. Sportsbar/Stripclub Blackout 2011 – It wasn’t as eventful as last year’s event, but it still had its moments.  We had ripped up $20’s, $3 cab rides, almost-fights with eagles fans, shirts partially removed, magic markerings, fake names, and other moments that “apparently” happened.  All in all, it was a successful follow-up to last year’s event. 

1. The rain – We’ve had rainy rounds at previous MB2K’s; the Witch in MB2K3 included an hour plus stop at the turn, and one round at Worlds Tour was full of puddles, wetness and casual water.  But nothing was as bad as the last two days of MB2K11.  Showers throughout our rounds at Caledonia and Rivers Edge required all the raingear we had.  Some players without the correct raingear suffered; I’m looking at Bob and his khakis (“my legs are so cold!”). 

and now - The Top 10 Moments of MB2K9:

HM. Dick Talbot – By the end of MB2K11, Dick Talbot was a Pedophilic Grandpa who Greg was having relations with. In actuality, he was a nice old man who joined our threesome as a single.  He did stand a little close to you on the tee, but he was polite and put up with our nonsense.  Just always remember, Greg would do anything for Dick.

10.  Tony Watson – The final round of strange happenings continued after the round was over when Neil went into the pro shop to collect his course golf ball, to find his, Greg and Pete’s High School Principal Mr. Watson working at the pro shop.  I believe this is the first MB2K sighting of someone we knew in Myrtle. It’s a small world after all.

9.  Caledonia – Aside from the rain and the hangovers, the Monday round at Caledonia reminded us of what we had expected all along; Caledonia is one of the best, if not the best, course we play in Myrtle Beach.  It was a long ride from the Tahitian Princess, but all of us agreed it was worth it. Course grades for MB2K11; Caledonia A+, Barefoot Norman B+, Rivers Edge B, Prestwick F-!

8. MB2K11 Memorable shots – Greg’s chip in on the first hole at Prestwick, Bob’s bridge shot at Caledonia, Neil’s 165 yard 5 wood into the wind/rain at the par 3 at River’s Edge. But the shot of MB2K11 belongs to Mike Riba for his cartpath aided chip on 18 at Caledonia that led to a par. 

7. The Tahitian Princess – Special thanks goes to 2-first-name Jim Stephen for the hookup on the new digs.  We can all agree the Tahitian Princess was a major upgrade over the Yacht Room.  We each had our own room for the first time at MB2K, so unfortunately there was only a small amount of snuggling this year. 

6. BPTHNWAM Jon Riba avenges his demons – Jon quietly regrets caving to Matt’s stroke demands, but his effort at this year’s MB2K proved he can play with the big boys.  Jon placed 2^nd in this year’s tournament, improving 30 strokes on his score from last year. He will be a favorite at MB2K12.

5. The best rounds of MB2K11 – The low overall round of MB2K11 with strokes was Mike’s 96(80) at Caledonia on Monday.  The low overall round without strokes was Greg’s 81 at Caledonia.  A+ for Caledonia; should it be our new home course??

4.  Matt winning MB2K11 – There was a little controversy over the strokes, but at the end 3 or 4 strokes would have won MB2K11 for Matt as he finished with a 5 stroke victory over Jon. He put together 4 consistent rounds of golf and did not let the weather become a factor in the final 2 rounds.  Congratulations on the win rookie, and we all look forward to you defending your title in MB2K12.

3.  The Golf – What what what???? This is an upset in the making! The Golf has always been a top 2 moment, and the only time it wasn’t #1 was when Greg shattered MB2K records in his MB2K7 victory. But 3rd? What did golf do to deserve this? Well, besides giving us two rainy rounds, the answer is…………………………………………….nothing.  Golf was wonderful as usual, and we are now 44 for 44 in our 11 years of MB2K. But what this year gave us was 2 events that without a doubt deserve to be ranked higher, and which we might not possibly see ever again.

 

2.  The Search Party a.k.a CSI Myrtle Beach – In a scene reminiscent of “The Missing” with a “Stand by Me” feel, we had search parties, choppers, rescue canines and tons of real North Carolina PO-lice on the 11^th hole at Rivers Edge searching for a missing 19 year old boy, a suspected suicide, who lived near the golf course.  Sadly, they did indeed find his body shortly thereafter, and possibly by the 11^th green, as while we finished putting, 6 suits ran into the marshy woods adjacent to our carts while the chopper hovered overhead.   The whole scene was surreal; it started with 2 cop cars on the ride from the 10^th to the 11^th hole, and continued with a small search party approaching us after we reached our drives.  We waited a few times, as to not hit any of the search party with our awful shots and we were approached a few times by individuals who apologized for “interrupting our rounds” to which we replied overly apologetically for interrupting their “real life situation”.  All in all, it was a somber situation, and it resulted in our first MB2K death.  God speed young man, obviously you felt life wasn’t worth living which is extremely sad.  Expected Bob Smith comments began immediately as, in the midst of a par streak, he stated “search parties bring out the best in my game”.  However he was topped on Neil’s Facebook post by a friend who said “wow. Tough course?”.  

1.  MB2K Football Wars – It was the reason why these dates were selected. It was the reason for everything; why we were rained on, the search party timing, the travel issues, etc.  And we wouldn’t change any part of it to replace the Football Wars of MB2K11; Greg’s Tennessee Titans vs. Bob, Mike and Jon’s Pittsburgh Steelers and Pete’s Philadelphia Eagles vs. Neil’s Buffalo Bills.  Dream matchups of all of our teams (sorry Matt), made it an MB2K weekend we could not pass up.  We were slightly scared in July as the lockout seemed possible, but relieved when the sides agreed and we knew this date wouldn’t have been chosen in vain.  The Steelers crushed the Titans, 38-17, as Ben Rapistberger threw for 5 td’s and the Steeler D controlled CJ2K.  The Bills held on to defeat Philly, 31-24, as Fred Jackson ran all over the Eagles shoddy D and the Bills defense intercepted Mike Vick 4 times.   2 matchups which may not occur in the same week again in another MB2K, and for that we salute the NFL scheduling committee with honorary MB2K awards! Thank you kind sirs! We salute you!

Until MB2K12…………

MB2KX – The year we reached double digits.

 

After 10 years of being tabbed the BPTHNWAM, Peter Vinch can finally add MB2K champion to his resume.  Previously the best player to have never won a major, Pete put together 4 days of solid golf, and held off his nerves on the back nine Wednesday to take home his first title, coasting to a six shot victory. Pete’s best round came Tuesday at World Tour, where his 101 (adjusted 81) led the pack and gave him the outright tournament lead.   Pete also tied for the best score at both Tidewater and Legends Heathland, all but solidifying his first career tournament victory.  With his win, the current MB2K standings are as follows:

 

3 wins – Greg Picarello

 

2 wins – Neil Schoenberg, Robert Smith the III

 

1 win – Chris Grove, Mike Riba, Peter Vinch

 

MB2KX saw another addition to the MB2K family, with Jon Riba playing with the group for the first time. Jon struggled at times, but that’s to be expected when you have 2 young kids at home and have to play golf with Bob Smith. 

 

MB2K6 Champion Chris Grove was not able to attend MB2KX, but we will hopefully have him and his ungodly loud snoring back for MB2KXI. 

 

Final scores will be posted on MB2K.com, However, for our records, with handicap adjustments, they ended as:

 

Sixth place - Jon Riba – 380

 

Fifth place – Greg Picarello – 363

 

Fourth place – Robert Smith – 353

 

Third place – Mike Riba – 352

 

Second place – Neil Schoenberg – 349

 

First place – Peter Vinch – 343

 

Now onto the ramblings:

 

The Top 10 Quotes/Sayings/Objects from MB2KX:

 

HM. “One of my baggages is in Atlanta” – Random girl in the MB airport to her boyfriend, overheard by Neil. Brought back memories of last years gem “Donnell. Mine bags on A!” 

 

10.  Tar Baby’s Pancake House and Captain Poo’s – Yikes Myrtle Beach, THASS RAYCESS.  

 

9. “Pitt is Shit” – The quote from the rental car guy to Bob to open our MB2KX experience. Bob was shocked but gave him an A for the hate. 

 

8.  “Judge Mills Lane says, I’ll allow it” – Judge Mills Lane allows most things, but even MB2K brought out a few overruled items. 

 

7. “Wham bam in the clam” – Sports dominated the television this year,  but we did spend a few hours with Daniel Tosh of Tosh.0 who left us in stitches during a scene of terms for a doing the deed.  A close second occurred when the 7 year old was asked why he stole his grandmothers’ car; his response was “I wanted to do hood things”. 

 

6.  Cigar Guy – The greatest sports picture of all time gave us a new Photoshop king in cigar guy.  We will invite cigar guy to future MB2K’s. If you invite him, he will come. 

 

5. “We gon find you, we gon find you.” – This year’s web gem was brought to us by Antoine Dodsen of Mississippi, whose remixed news story of his sister’s attempted assault is also the song of MB2KX.  Amazingly enough, the assailant has not yet been identified as Big Ben. 

 

4. The Ray Lewis Jersey – Greg bought a Ray Lewis jersey just to piss off the Pittsburgh contingent.  Gotta love the hate! Both Silky Johnson AND Judge Mills Lane says, I’ll allow it. 

 

3. The Bridges of World Tour – Pete did not hit the bridge at #18 at St Andrews, so he made up for it with hitting the Bridge at #13 at Augusta to extend his streak of hitting bridges at World Tour to 2.  Runner up bridge hitting – Neil hitting the bridge on Wizard #17 with his tee shot on #16. 

 

2.  The sausage/bacon egg and cheese on english muffin breakfast sandwiches at Tidewater – the MB2KX winner for top food.  So good, Bob Smith ate 2.  Food Win!

 

1.  “Six” – After the Steelers L on Sunday, you could still hear the Pittsburgh contingent making sure the sports bar knows who has the most Super Bowl wins; especially Maclin, who hopefully remembers how many hands he needs to stick up Bob’s butt to pull out rings. 

 

The top females of MB2KX:

 

And then there was one.  The cart girls were all grandmothers, and the waitresses were gross. So this year, I anoint a lone top female of MB2KX

 

1. Kathie Lee – Our server at Overtimes for the debauchery known as football Sunday. She served us for 7 hours that must have felt like a lifetime. She regaled us with stories of Big Ben when he wasn’t assaulting women. And she even partook in a jagerbomb or 2 when the shots were rolling in.  We rewarded her handsomely with a 25% tip on top of her already mandated 18% tip, but she probably deserved even more. No longer will I be forced to think of Kathie Lee Gifford when I think of that name. And for this Kathie Lee, we dub you the only female worth mentioning in this recap.  God speed lassie, god speed. 

 

The Top 10 Most Disappointing Moments, Events, Things of MB2KX:

 

HM. Bilo leftovers – 2 unopened bags of chips, an unopened bag of seeds, a unopened bag of jerky, 4 donuts, 10+ beers, and an unopened bottle of Dr. Bob. Food Fail #1.

 

10.  0-6 at Sawgrass #17 – The 3^rd hole at the World Tour Open course is the famous 17^th hole at Sawgrass.  Our group went 0-6 in hitting that green. Big props to Jon for putting it in the trap and not in the pond like the rest of us. 

 

9. The Wizard bugs – still not sure what they were, but they were gross. Saw them on the range and there were a few during the round, but they came out in droves on 18. They were all around the cart. Bob swallowed one. 

 

8. Krispy Kreme Koffee – Yeah, I did that.  (And it wasn’t good, tasted stale and like plastic. Plus they gave us 500 creams and 250 sugars in huge bags.)

 

7.  Maclin Part II – He’ll resurface again later, but this drunken slob wouldn’t stop standing up and getting in the way of the Steelers contingent while they were trying to watch the game. He magically appeared at the other bar later in the night and stole the girl Bob was talking to.  Stupid Philly fans. 

 

6. The annual Sticky Fingaz MNF feast – Such high expectations were not lived up too when the Sticky Fingaz staff lazily put all of the meats in containers and had us make our own sandwiches.  The fries were cold, the ribs were gross, the mashed potatoes were lousy and the G was too salty. Mike did pilfer a container of barbeque sauce to capture the MB2KX Pilfer of the Year award.  Congratulations Mike! Food Fail #2.    

 

5. Bob’s MB2KX finish – Bob was well on his way to breaking 100 at Legends Heathland and maybe, just maybe, giving Pete a run for his money, when he played the last 5 holes at +14, scoring 9, par, 9, triple, double. He finished in 4^th, 10 strokes back. 

 

4. Neil’s early onset Alzheimer’s – Forgot phone in golf cart at the Wizard (got it back), long sleeve tee shirt in golf cart at Barefoot Love Course (lost), hipster hooded sweatshirt at the bar Sunday night (lost), but luckily he put the sunglasses in the car even though waking up Monday he thought they were at the bar too (found). 

 

3. Damon’s – Saturday nights dinner will forever be remembered for the look Mike gave Bob after Neil reminded them about the Sticky Fingaz located near the condo.  Let’s just say the food at Damon’s wasn’t very good.  And that Bob has a new nickname. And that when you lose a bet at future MB2K’s there’s a new punishment.  Food Fail #3.

 

2. Construction on the Bridge to Barefoot Resorts – From 10PM to 6AM during MB2KX, the bridge to our condo was out for construction. Apparently we were given a map when we checked in, but no one informed us of this until after it was too late.  In order to get in the other end of the resort, you have to drive 15-20 minutes out of the way, down 17, 22, the wrong way on 31, Watertower road and finally some other road. The problem was nobody knew this; not us, not the people at the bar, no one. The Ribas tried to drive home from the bar after 10PM Sunday night and spent hours driving around looking for the other entrance.  They came back to the bar, and asked for directions but no one believed them; “The Bridge is out, no way.” They tried to beg the construction workers and the foreman, but to no avail. They almost got a hotel room. They finally arrived 2 hours later.  Bob, Neil and Greg left the bar at 2AM. The cabbie didn’t know the route either. They spent almost 45 minutes in the cab, with the cabbie calling Cooter and his other cronies trying to find a way in. The fare was $30 because he reset it after it had gone up over $75.  We may have been in North Carolina.  All this for construction on a 30 yard bridge that was 5 minutes away from the bar. 

 

1.  Sunday October 3^rd 2010 1PM – 10PM – Holy shit, where to begin.  We should have a top ten just discussing what happened, or what may have happened.  All four of our football teams lost; the Bills got destroyed, the Titans should have won but lost and then got accused of playing dirty, the Steelers lost again in the final minute and the Eagles lost to McNabb.  Because of this, we turned from buckets of beers to consuming multiple Irish Car Bombs and Jaeger Bombs. Neil, who ate about 12 wings during this bomb and beer fest (Food Fail #4), blacked out for about 3 hours and apparently almost punched some poor woman in the face as she entered the bar, causing her and her family to decide to eat elsewhere.  Bob and Riba got into a fight, with Bob punching Riba in the temple. This apparently prompted some brotherly love in which Jon stuck up for his older brother by dragging Bob on the ground and scraping up his arm.  Greg decided Bob should eat something and offered him half of his Au Jus sandwich, which Bob promptly threw on the floor (Food Fail #5). Pete drove Bob home, but Bob snuck out of the house like a teenager and met us back at the bar, and told us 100 times not to tell Pete he went back out.  Of course Pete found out the next day.  I’m sure much much more happened, but as stated earlier, I blacked out for nearly half of this.  Good times, Good disappointing times.  

 

Just a few extra items before we get to the last section:

 

Expansion – We are looking at 7 participants for MB2KXI, so the invites are out to a few more people.  Pete had mentioned that a buddy of his wanted in, and I know a friend of mine who wants in as well.  As said previously, any amount is good except 5.  This will result in a little more planning so we might have to get started a little earlier. But this is nothing Barbie Chestnut can’t handle.

 

MB2K the First 10 Years – A look back at the greatest moments of the last 10 years of MB2K will come out at some point in the near future.  If anyone has anything they would like to add, send me an email.

 

Pictures – Greg will be adding some pictures to the recap at mb2k.com.  Go visit to see some good moments on camera. Speaking of moments……

 

The Top 10 Moments of MB2KX:

 

HM.  Jon’s chip in on Wizard #1 – from 50 yards out for birdie on the first hole of the practice round. 

 

10. MB2KX golf achievements – Other than ones mentioned later, Jon’s 12 fairways at Barefoot Love is the 2^nd highest in a round in MB2K history, with his 32 fairways for MB2KX being 4^th best.  Greg’s 22 greens were 4^th best for an MB2K and Neil’s 130 putts were 3^rd best. 

 

9.  Bob’s tee shot on Wizard #17 – His ball mark was in the cup for a different pin position. The closest thing to a hole-in-one since Grove’s tee shot at Kings North needed another rotation. 

 

8.  Travel/Lodging – The Yacht room was again a success, and the Philadelphia contingent had direct flights from Philadelphia to Myrtle on Saturday.  The Sat-Wed format was as successful as last years Fri-Tue was. 

 

7. Maclin Part III – After the Redskins either won or scored (blacked out remember), the Pittsburgh contingent got into his face and started clapping and high-fiving his friend Portis.    

 

6. Neil’s 5-wood at Tidewater #17 – After a cart path assisted tee shot, Neil’s sliced 5-wood shaped around 2 large trees landed 5 feet short of the flag for the closest thing we’ve had to an MB2K albatross. The eagle putt was missed but birdie saved for back to back birdies, along his way to a 2^nd straight 2^nd place finish. 

 

5. The Weather – it’s been solid for 10 years, but it’s never been as nice as we had it this year.  With comfortable temperatures peaking in the low 70’s and brisk mornings which required long sleeves and allowed for long pants.  No rain at all during the rounds, and although Myrtle had been crushed the week before, the courses weren’t too wet except for the practice round Friday.  A big thank you goes to Jon kid for being born the last week in September, forcing MB2KX to October! 

 

4. The Scramble at World Tour – MB2K’s first scramble featured Pete, Jon and Neil vs. Bob, Greg and Mike in a battle of strength and endurance with an additional 9 holes played at the International Course at World Tour.  At the end it came down to putting as Team PJN went 0-18 on 6 birdie chances, including 1 hole where their 8 foot uphill putt missed an inch short, lipped out right and lipped out left.  Team BGM limited themselves to only 11 putts and with a nice chip on 9, won the scramble by a score of +1 to +2 and a free dinner at Outback.  Bonus points for Team BGM on their attempt at cheating by trying to tee off from the senior tees on the par 5, only to be halted by Team PJN who caught them right away and sent them back. 

 

3. Greg’s round at Barefoot Love course – The best round of MB2KX and one of the best rounds in MB2K history came on day 1 when Greg knocked down a tournament record 5 birdies en route to a 79.  The 79 tied for the 2^nd best MB2K score of all time and the 5 birdies was a round AND tournament record, with 1 birdie in a later round to set the new birdie tournament record at 6. 

 

2.  Pete’s first victory – Pete’s first win at MB2K saw him shoot 16 strokes better then last year and 23 strokes better then MB2K8.  His last 3 finishes at MB2K were 5^th, 6^th and 5^th, so it’s good to see Pete bounce back and claim victory.  His 101 at World Tour included an 8 on 18, and was ever so close to the Pete we saw in the early years of MB2K.  Congratulations, and get ready to defend in MB2KXI!

 

1.  The golf – What can I say that hasn’t been said before. Another solid year of MB2K saw a record 5 ½ rounds of golf played in pristine conditions.  A few potential rainstorms were avoided and other then some wind and cruddy greens, the courses and conditions were perfect.  Once again, the handicapping system seemed fairly accurate as Pete played the best golf and won the tournament. 

 

Last year, Mike Riba finished up his fifth place finish and talked about leaving the game for good.  This year, Mike Riba talked shit on the 68^th hole.  Riba put together 4 solid rounds of golf, in route to coasting to a nine stroke victory and his first MB2K title.   Riba’s victory was a result of the separation he attained in Monday’s third round, by shooting 7 strokes better then the field on Monday’s round at Pawley’s Plantation, clearly the toughest course played in this years open.  With his victory, the current MB2K standings are as follows:

3 wins - Greg Picarello

2 wins - Neil Schoenberg, Robert Smith the III

1 win - Chris Grove, Mike Riba

Best player to have never won a major - Pete Vinch

Final Scores will be posted on MB2K.com. However, for our records, with handicap adjustments, ended as:

Sixth place - Greg Picarello - 388

Fifth place - Peter Vinch - 379

Fourth place - Chris Grove - 361

Third place - Robert Smith the III - 360

Second place - Neil Schoenberg - 348

First place - Mike Riba - 339

Now onto the ramblings:

The Top 10 Quotes/Sayings/Objects of MB2K9:

HM.  The super rain storm of death - Magically, there was no rain during the rounds, but the drive for the L’ville crew from the Wizard to the condo was interrupted by a monsoon and some Oregon Trail type barging.

10. “Donnell.  Mine bags on A!” - Greg and Neil heard this grammatical gem in the Philly airport while picking up the checked baggage.

9. The end of MB2K poker - With the decline in poker playing amongst the group, the poker chips went unused in MB2K9.  The end of an era; maybe next year we’ll play some canasta!

8. Emeka Okafor sighting - The official celebrity sighting of MB2K9 occurred at the Charlotte airport, joining such celebs as Duce Staley and Fred Funk.

7. The Outback Sam Adams Glass - Thievery!

6. Super Bilo - The upgrade from Bilo to Super Bilo is summed up in this text: Beer oj chips Gatorade fruit donuts cakes jerky tums…..180 bucks.

5. Mini-Games - Mini-games didn’t catch on in its first year, but Mike Riba was the big winner with 3 victories.

4. “Get the hell out of here” - Bob’s response to the elevator tweakers who kept talking about our Sticky Fingaz take out order.

3. F.U. Fridays - ROCK 107.1 ON YOUR FM DIAL. MAD MAX F.U. FRIDAYS!!!! WE’RE SO EDGY, MAN!!!!!  A station so hard, they play Bon Jovi followed by Def Leppard’s “Armageddon it” (a song which ironically Pete had never heard before).

2. Rehab - The official TV show of MB2K9 - Live from the cheesiest place on earth, the Vegas Hard Rock Hotel pool. Deebo, douches and debauchery!!

1. Indoor Chipping - For the second straight year, a plastic golf ball game claims the top prize.  Big shots out to Neil for hitting 3 of his first 4 attempts, and Greg for hitting the target on the fridge and leaving prizes for the cleaning people behind it.

The Top Females of MB2K9:

HM. Barbie Chestnut - We didn’t meet her, but she was on our mind the whole trip. Thanks Barbie!

5. Stacia - L’ville’s own, who Neil and Pete saw at the Charlotte airport and whose name took us 8 hours to remember.

4. Our server at Overtimes - friendly!

3. 2 girls on our flight home from Myrtle to Charlotte - classy!

2. Lady in the van who asked for $4-5 for gas so she could pick up her daughter - druggie!

1. The cart girl from the Fazio course - FINALLY! It’s only been about 3 years since we had a cart girl under the age of 65.  The one at the Wizard wasn’t bad either, but this one was the best.  Hooray!

The Top 10 Most Disappointing Moments, Events, Things of MB2K9:

HM.  R.I.P dead bird - “You finally got a birdie” - Boooooooooooooo!

10. Bad golf shots - There were plenty this year. Just from round 3 at Pawley’s Plantation you have Neil’s duff/duff/shank on 1, Pete’s 2 in the water on 6, Grove’s “Mickleson” from bunker to bunker, Riba’s almost miss on 13’s island green, etc, etc…….

9. Myrtle injuries - Pete’s shoulder, Greg’s leg; this years winner is Neil’s eye.

8. Dunes Club rules - We know Dunes Club is semi-private, but “our members will call us if you do anything we don’t like” is a little much. Thanks Nazi golf course.  Fun fact - Neil doesn’t wear a belt while golfing anymore, and that’s always fun when you have to tuck your shirt in.

7. Vagina moments - The Pete Vinch bar tap-out, medium coffee, tons of leftover beer; but this years winner is the 6-burgh crew for not one, but two pre-10PM bedtimes. You would think those large, manly coffees would keep them caffeinated.

6. GheyB - So out of all the female servers at the Outback, we get stuck with a guy named GheyB. We should have introduced him to “press 7″ guy, they might have hit it off.

5. Greg’s golf - Pic will be the first to admit that the swing was broken.  3 rounds over 100 from the MB2K 3-time champion.  Sloptastic!

4. Food! - Donuts for breakfast, hot dogs or McDonalds for lunch, Sticky Fingaz or Outback for dinner. MB2KXV’s injury report is going to include some clogged arteries.  Sloptastic!

3. 9’s and 10’s - The scorecards aren’t around to prove it, but there were a lot more 9’s (10) and 10’s (2) then could be remembered from recent years. Sloptastic!

2. The Putting - There were a lot of lowlights with the flat-stick this year: four 4-putts (Grove, Riba, Bob 2) with Grove needing to hit a 5 footer to avoid back-to-back ones, Greg 3-putting 3 consecutive holes after hitting the green; but the winner was Bob and his phenomenal 44 putts at Pawley’s!

1. The Round at Pawley’s Plantation - The aftereffects on Sunday’s debauchery must have left a mark.  The ride down took forever, the snack bar/cart girl closed at 3, 30mph blustery gusts of wind which felt at us on almost every hole; it all didn’t work in our favor.  If it wasn’t your worst round of the tournament (Neil, Grove, Bob), it was you’re your second-worst.  Our group went 1-54 on GIR’s on the back 9, and that one was because Neil’s drive ricocheted off of a tree into the middle of the fairway.  Collectively, not our best effort.

Before we get to the final section just a few extra items:

Next year is MB2KX - start thinking back to Myrtles past to come up with your favorite courses, and Riba, think of where you want the Champion’s pick to be.

Thanks to Greg, photos from this years open can be found at:

http://www.mb2k.com/photos/album/72157622366163051/mb2k9.html

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=113743&id=635883387&l=dfec261440

and now - The Top 10 Moments of MB2K9:

HM. Grove’s drive on 18 at Dunes Club - Shits and giggles 2^nd ball - Swing, ball hits ground, ball pops in air, ball caught by Grove, Re-teed. Wish we had video.

10. MB2K9 golf achievements - No records were set in MB2K9 but we had a few top 3 finishes.  Mike’s 339 adjusted score in the 2^nd lowest in MB2K history, while Neil’s 348 score is the 3^rd lowest score.  Neil’s 25 total pars were good for 3^rd on the tournament list, while Greg and Neil’s 9 greens at the Fazio course are good for T-3^rd on the individual round list.  Also, props to Bob for leading the tournament in both fairways categories, 25 total and 9 at Pawley’s.

9. Chris Grove and the Mystery of the Missing Golf Balls - Of course, they end up being in the only place he didn’t look, the other car; and of course, they were found after golf was finished.  Now the only mystery that remains is if he punched himself in the face like he said he was going to?

8. The Practice Round - Never in MB2K history had such a vigilant line been placed in the sand between the L’ville and 6-Burgh crews.  L’ville had early flights into Myrtle so decided to play the Wizard instead of doing nothing all afternoon. 6-Burgh called shenanigans.  Cheater comments were spewed, cry-baby Kanye West email attachments were sent. In the end, the round neither helped nor hurt anyone and will be remembered for Neil’s 18^th hole where he needed a par for 79 and lost his drive and second shot in the drink.

7. The Yacht Club Room 12004A-D - How about the new digs!  Barbie Chestnut overtook Jim Paisley as our favorite travel agent as she hooked us up with a fancy condominium overlooking the scenic inter-coastal waterway and with a slight view of the Ocean.  No cockroaches, semi-comfortable beds, 4 showers, and a separate room for the Grove death-snore equaled a quality time spent by all at the new location.

6. Football mayhem - The Titans, Bills and Steelers all took an L on Sunday, resulting in angry, drunk, 6-burghers yelling at other patrons and making fun of the poor fat toothless bills fan.  This would prove to be the winner of the MB2K “Hatorade” moment, which occurred when the Steelers lost and the whole bar started clapping.

5. A Better, Smarter MB2K - The decision last year to move Myrtle to a Sat PM/Sun AM/Mon PM/Tue AM format was a complete success.  Accompanied by the condo move, and the group flight arrival times, MB2K9 was the easiest and most thought out tournament to date.  The only exception was the Monday morning drive to Pawley’s which will rethink our desire to go back to Caledonia in MB2KX.

4. Sticky Fingaz - “The Order”.

3. Round 2 at the Barefoot Fazio Course - The antithesis of the round at Pawley’s Plantation. All 6 players shot adjusted rounds in the 80’s (Bob 82, Neil 82, Greg 83, Grove 85, Pete 88, Riba 88) for the first time in MB2K history. Our first run at a Barefoot course was a success, and there are three others still to play.

2. Y.E. Riba - Riba’s road to the championship included his best 2 rounds in MB2K history (100, 102).  While in previous years he would tire after a few rounds, this year Riba seemed to get better as the days progressed.  His unadjusted total of 415 was his lowest by 17 strokes and 43 strokes better than he did last year, once again proving the handicapping system pretty solid for the second consecutive year.  Once again, congratulations to Y.E. Riba on a tourney well played, and be ready next year to defend your crown!

1. The golf - Another solid MB2K played with no disruptions. The magical rain storms predicted by weather.com stayed away, and we even had two sunny days to finish up our trip.  13 of the 24 rounds saw adjusted scores in the 80’s, so for the most part the golf was fairly decent.

Until MB2KX!